i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
