Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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