i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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