I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
