Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize