There was a lot of him and a little penis
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
You should frame my arrest warrant.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
