I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
