belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
