Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
