Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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