eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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