I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
