she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
This house was built for laser tag.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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