Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
