dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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