Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
