You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
