Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
