This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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