Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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