so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
