girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
