I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Randomize
