Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
