You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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