Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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