Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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