I can't watch pbs sober anymore
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
