He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
