were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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