just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Randomize
