Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
