As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
