Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize
