i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
