He asked to "fluff my boner.."
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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