Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
