While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
At least life still wants to fuck me.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
