hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
