Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
