I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
