In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
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