you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
