she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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