I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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