Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
