can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
