just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
