at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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