I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
